Believe it or not, when a person gives some attention to sexual challenges, the majority of them can be resolved and improved upon within a short amount of time (the average is around three or four months). Of course, it's hard to determine the exact amount of time depending on the nature of the challenge, a client's motivation and circumstances, as well as issues of resistance. Whether individually or with your partner, heterosexual or LGBT, I can provide a confidential and safe space for you to examine, better understand, and more fully embrace your sexuality. I am trained for in-person consultations as well as scheduled phone conversations.
Traditionally, this kind of personal care is called "Clinical Sex Therapy," or "Sex Coaching." I don't like using the word "therapy" because all too often potential clients believe that they will be receiving psychotherapy. Although sexuality has a psychological aspect, I am not a psychotherapist. I like the sound of the term, "Sex Coaching," but this conjures images of me next to a couple in bed, yelling, "Ready... okay! Faster, faster... Drive it on home!" This is not the case, either. Although the terms, "Private or Personal Consultations" is not ideal (sounds a little too business-like), it is the term I feel is most accurate, and it's what I'm most comfortable using.
As a helping professional, I am at all times concerned about the sexual life and welfare of my clients. I believe that finding pleasure in one’s body (sexual or otherwise) is a natural part of being alive, a human right, and a free gift for all who pursue its happiness.
Tools that I use in my practice:
Confidentiality and trust between clients and myself are essential elements for a successful outcome. All issues and matters shared within our private sessions are completely confidential.
My approach is nonjudgmental. To the best of my ability I will unconditionally accept clients who may be in need of discovering new ways to manage how they express their sexuality for themselves and with their partners. This gives clients permission to be open about their deepest sexual desires and the freedom to speak candidly, without fear of condemnation.
A significant amount of time will be given to sexuality education. Because we live in a society where finding factual information about sex is a challenge, many issues can be resolved simply by learning the truth about them. Therefore, during our time together your breadth of sexual knowledge will increase. When it comes to sexuality, ignorance is not bliss.
My approach affects behavior. The effect of information is limited unless we can put it into practice. So you will most likely be given homework and exercises to try as experiments. For these assignments a full and thorough rational will be provided. Furthermore, you will never be required to do anything contrary to your personal values. Still, applying what you learn is integral to making progress and this takes time and energy apart from our sessions. Focusing on your sexuality outside of these sessions empowers you to enjoy sexuality without anyone else being in control but yourself. Fortunately, since the homework is about sex most clients find it rather fun as well as insightful.
There are occasions that my consultations are experiential. The vast majority of sexuality education is exclusively taught verbally with an overwhelming focus on the biological. This leaves most people lacking any kind of sexual skills. As a result, a well-rounded sexual health is rarely achieved. Therefore, being a sex coach and not a psychotherapist, I have the freedom to teach very specific exercises, skills and techniques when verbal instruction falls short. Again, clients will never be required to do anything contrary to their personal values.
If you are willing and committed to work with this process, I commit to provide the best service I am capable of while you are in my care. Together we will enter into a trusting and valued professional relationship with me that I take seriously. Helping you get the most pleasure out of your sex life is important and my vocational calling. Like I always say, “Wouldn't the world be a better place if everyone had a healthy and happy sex life?" And that "everyone" includes you.